Thicken it.

Business.

Is something else.

I gather the word busines comes from being very busy!! A business sure makes one busy. I have, for better or worse, so very recently, entered the world of business. If only in a very small way...but still, business is business.;)

One of the first things I have picked up in just a few months, is that one needs to be thick-skinned to do business of any kind. If you dare to start your own thing, you have to grow those extra layers of skin. No other go.

Especially if you are the 'non-business' type (as I'm sure I was hitherto considered to be), people will look you up and down...and then some. They will gaze shrewdly at you and make some remark or the other. The remarks from such folk may often be encouraging, but not always ring true. Words of caution on the other hand, almost always ring true, but seldom come ...unless from someone very close.

So, mostly, a 'green' businessman/woman must endure many a discouraging word or lack of support and take it in his or her stride.

Therefore, I have thickened my skin as much as I can(!) and am trying to steer well away from 'over-sensitive' as I usually might be accused of being. Not that it all doesn't bother me, but I am TRYING to shrug it off and concentrate on the many, many tasks at hand.

I'm making a serious attempt to focus on being practical.

After all, if I fail, I would be neither the first, nor the last. And if I succeed...well then too, I will be one of the many. So, this brings me back to a memorable lesson I had in school about tennis star Chris Evert who, I understand, was being interviewed for her 'grace-under-pressure' or some such thing. She was heard quoting Rudyard Kipling:"If you can meet both Triumph and Disaster, and treat those two imposters the same..."

I made it a point to understand the depth of these words even then, and I do so admire the meaning even more now.

Yes, business is...something else.

Tending to the sick

I wonder, what is the pre-requisite for being a patient-attender? You know, for one to effectively tend to the sick?

If ever there was a grey area, this is it. Sick people require matter-of-fact 'tenders'. From my understanding, having seen my mother tend my grandparents (her in-laws) and an aunt attend to hers, I have come to the conclusion that you need to have some of the following going for you if you are a caretaker: -
(Note: I have myself done a fair amount of tending...so I dare to launch a post into this subject)

1. Be cheerful but not overly chirpy, as you may thereby cause the ill to develop a complex!
2. Be matter-of-fact and not emotional or overly expressive since this can go either way with the patient. Emotional 'tenders' will be just that and this may not be in the patient's best interests. A sick person is already slightly emotional probably, and would not want faces to be pulled, long faces or to witness any smirks. I guess this is why nurses are all mostly a very objective and slightly detached lot.
3. The matter-of-fact business has to include a good level of 'lack of disgust'. Bodily functions are not always pleasant and one needs to deal with it or be prepared to at least. This is perhaps the most important point.
4. A good level of compassion and a slightly lower level of sympathy is required.
5. A sense of humour is most important. Rather than mere smiles for the patient, drawing out a chuckle or a laugh is far more beneficial and of course, more fun.
6. Handling people -- the whole matter-of-fact thing comes into play again. People will say many things and give many opinions (mostly useless) and mess with the atmosphere around the sick bed. They need to be politely and firmly refuted. After all, most of these folks will not walk their talk, so shutting them up is a good option.

There are more points am sure, and it's not as if I am an expert or can be in line with more than one or two of the above points, but having closely observed the general, productive ways of caretaking, I just wanted to ponder more about it aloud in a post...

One thing is for sure. Anyone can fall sick enough to require special care. It can happen to anybody. Remembering this is jolly good. The 'it has not happened to me' business is rubbish thinking.

Oh..and remembering Point 1 above,... CHEERS!;)

Love may do the trick

I am likely to incur the wrath, fury, annoyance and more/less of some people when I say this: If you really, really, REALLY love someone...anyone...then, you are indeed a believer. I feel, when you so love someone, you simply have-to-have-to have the faith. I don't see how you can get by otherwise. I just don't.

I mean, when your loved one is sick or in danger, what do you do? Fret? Cry? Despair? Stay practical?

Or...secretly pray?

Not that anything you (the non-believer) say to this may be convincing enough and I daresay you may not really want to bother with explanations here, but still...I have said it. And I would definitely love to hear the other side's thoughts . Who knows, there is a good chance that the answers may be intelligent and perhaps even set me thinking. If someone I love ran into some grave trouble(God forbid!!!), I just don't know what I would do other than pray. For me, there is no other recourse. I mean, yeah, I would do other things necessary to help that person and not JUST pray (that would be stupid and irresponsible), but I would not just do everything in my power to ease things and then sit back. I would pray mighty hard.

I have to admit though, that if you are the detached type, perhaps you really could stay a non-believer. That is possible...

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

Note: This post is NOT aimed at anyone in particular. Not as a jibe or poke, definitely. This is just some loud thinking being aired -- a loud wondering if you will;)

Oh no, MJ has gone away!

MJ in my favourite stage of his life -- the looks, music, everything

Michael Jackson (MJ)

The news of Michael Jackson's death has pushed me out of my inactive mode on this blog. He is one of my all-time favourite musicians. I was around 10 when I first heard his 'Beat It', 'Thriller' and 'Billie Jean'...and my father got the newly released 'Thriller' video and its making, for my sis and me. We watched it nearly everyday until we had the whole thing by heart -- the steps, the moves, the songs (we blabbered most of the words thanks to his style of singing), the dialogues...even the details of the make up, as he was a werewolf in that, and agonised over his chemistry with 'that girl' who had acted with him in 'Thriller'.

The 'Thriller' link, a must-watch: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Xs9OQHpwDE

I was really upset at the news of his death this morning, much to most people's surprise. I cannot say why I am so upset. It may be because I associate MJ with some great memories. He enriched my musical inclinations. He along with 'Wham' was 'up there' at one point for me, both literally and figuratively. Their posters were all over the walls at home.

I am going to list out the memories I have in connection with MJ...as a tribute to this awesome performer who is no more. I actually harboured secret hopes of attending one of his concerts somewhere in the world...sigh.

• I got my own room around the 'Beat It' song period -- small room no doubt, but my 'own' nevertheless. Own room with own tape recorder so I could listen to my own music. A lot of it MJ.
• I would listen to him religiously, so much so that my 80 year old grandad in the next room decided he needed to know what the fuss was all about and borrowed the Michael jackson tape from me. This was a typical, religious thaathaa who performed 2-3 hour long poojais every day! He seemed to quite enjoy it and only returned it after ten days or so when I made him!
• For a time, everyday after school, I would watch 'Thriller' with utmost fascination. Like a ritual.
• That was the first time I ever heard of a werewolf and my sis and I are were thereafter inspired to watch the 'adult film' titled an american werewolf in London which in turn, had inspired MJ to make 'Thriller'.
• I had fun entertaining my sis with the steps from the 'Thriller' video. No doubt, even the thought of this will entertain all now;)
• At that point MJ with his trademark crotch-clutching moves never struck me as vulgar. It was just a unique thing he did. Thankfully, I considered it inimitable so never tried it.
• I did try his moonwalk and it looked like nothing on earth...hey, after all, it was the moonwalk, heh heh. I think I fell a few times trying it since the floor and my footwear had to be slippery for me to accomplish a moonwalk. My older sis, the only privileged audience-member no doubt, was kept thoroughly mesmerised by my antics.
• When MJ performed Billi Jean on stage, it was fantastic. Truly one of the best stage performances I have ever seen. I still like it.
• Sadly, at ten and just above, hailing from Tamilnadu and based in the South of India, it was rather difficult for me to make out the words of his songs, which limited my rendering these numbers anywhere. His gasps, rasps and weird little breaths and noises, hoots, etc. in his songs required an extraordinary amount of guts to even try and imitate! BUT, it was super fun singing my versions of his words.
• It bothered me greatly that I felt he sounded girlish. And strangely, although I knew he was a guy and I was crazy about his music, I never had a crush on him in the romantic way. (I had way too many crushes back then!) I had a huge MJ fixation alright, but I guess he was too thin and too non-masculine-sounding for any romance!*sniff*
• The actual music in his songs even today is simply fabulous.
• His obsession with colour, black or white, never bothered me. I simply did not care since his music and performances were above colour. So, literally, I must tell him: it don't matter if you're black or white. However, I must say I preferred him black anyday.:-) It suited him so well.
• I had a poster of MJ's gifted to me by my Dad who adopted the if-you-can't-beat-'em, join 'em way, since he was the one who would bring us the latest music from all over the world and therefore the reason for the MJ craze in our home. This poster was not a very flattering one and my sis who was never a sucker for obsession as I am, simply refused to let me put it up in 'our' room. (Read: 'her' room -- one of the reasons I moved out into my own smaller room, hmph. The poster-decisions were all hers!)) . I did not want to put it up in my new room for what reason I forget... oh, yes, the poster was simply too LARGE, and so, I put it up in our bathroom, the one shared by my mom, sis and me. It was fixed with some new, then-latest, extremely effective adhesive blobs right opposite 'the throne', so that MJ would look down on us as we downloaded you-know-what-on-the-pot(!). My mom would get extremely annoyed and frustrated every time she went to the loo saying 'he makes me uncomfortable'. :-). When we finally decided to take it off after some years(!), I ended up giving it away to one highly grateful-to-the-point-of-tears, crazy-about-MJ classmate called Gina, whose claim to fame in school WAS being MAD about Michael Jackson. Hey Gina, wherever you are (I hardly knew you I know!), I wonder if even you are this moved today with MJ gone. If you are still an MJ fan, let me raise a glass in toast with you then...to MJ!
• At that point (early teens, etc.) when I saw any live concerts of his on TV, I would be amazed at the hysteria amongst the audience. Girls weeping, others clutching at their heads (even men), throwing off clothes, etc. I never understood that as I was too young. Frighteningly, I understand it now. Mob mentality catches on, I guess!
• In the song 'We are the World' (USA for Africa), he was easily the most interesting singer. Loved his parts. A very 'fervent' singer. Really felt his music. That was his specialty. Not to forget to mention his superb dancing skills.

'Billie Jean' video link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8VASYhabHkM Don't miss the moonwalk!

I don't think any of my friends 'got' MJ like I did then. I think Gina and I (I was more understated!) were the only ones in our class at school who really liked him so much. I guess the Tamil/Indian imitations of MJ's antics including Prabhu Deva, put people off! Ha ha.

Me, I still regularly listen to his numbers...

The scary case against him was indeed scary...but since he was acquitted, I am going with his innocence!

Amazing what music can do for you and to you. My favourites of his songs are Thriller, Beat It, Billie Jean, The way you make me feel, Girl is Mine, Bad, Wanna Be Startin' Something, and Ben, One Day in your life, Rockin' Robin when MJ was a kid, and many more.

May the King of Pop's soul rest in peace ...or perhaps even be reincarnated for some even better music if possible. That would suit us MJ fans just fine.

What if?

What if I was having dinner at the Golden Dragon at the Taj Mahal hotel in Mumbai that fateful evening? (very likely mind you, given how much I love that cuisine and the restaurant too).

What if it was I who got the shock of my life in the middle of a forkful of noodles on hearing gunshots or on suddenly seeing a terrorist with a machine gun barging in? Would I react fast? Would I chuck the fork, plate and everything else and dive for cover? Would I react fast enough to escape bullets and/or notice? Would I keep my cool? Would I even remember to take my loved ones (dining with me) with me under the table assuming I was fast and quick-thinking enough to spearhead any 'diving' operation?

Or would I gape and die with a fork in my hand and some uneaten food in my mouth? (NOT a pretty sight.Oh, am not trying to make funny of the situation. These are real thoughts.)

I thought these terrifying thoughts (even the THOUGHTS are creepy) and decided to come up with a plan. I would stay ever watchful through every single meal at every single five star hotel I visit and at the first sign of terror, I will yell 'get down' and yank my neighbours down with me. God forbid there will be no child in the vicinity. Then once under cover of hopefully the table, I will feverishly think up some plan to get out of the situation and perhaps valiantly try to help others...

Enough. I doubt that any amount of planning will ever help in certain situations. For example, we all know that certain diseases can strike us any time. Cancer springs to mind. So, will understanding the effects of the disease and treatment for it and the possible successes and failures of such treatments, (blah blah) EVER prepare me for that moment If I were to get the crushing news" "You have cancer."? I doubt it. Nothing can prepare you to condition your reaction to certain things...

A terror attack especially, is probably just that. One that causes extreme terror. Bombs, grenades, bullets, whatever. Who the hell can prepare for it?

It amazes me that people out there want to kill others with such horrific fury. But then I try chiding myself: "Hello, you are privileged. You have not experienced any extreme misery (grief of losing a loved one aside) like poverty or hunger or extreme physical / mental/emotional abuse.So you cannot even begin to judge the less fortunate who have gone astray".

True. But if a privileged soul like me does not question evil then who will? Surely not the warped-minded terrorists.

I guess I digressed again. But 2 whole days + (and still going on) of watching the relays on the informative and sometimes irresponsible TV channels has affected me quite a bit it seems.

Coming back to 'what if', I guess I don't know what I would do and definitely, I don't REALLY WANT to know, since the truth is I would hate to be in such a situation.

Still, the thoughts linger...What IF?

Chennai Roads

What prompted my previous post is actually this one...which I did n't write first.

The roads in Chennai as we know, are far from perfection. A couple of days ago, whilst driving, I thought to myself that I should crib about the state of Chennai's roads in my blog -- the potholes, the pits, the sudden speedbreakers, the general unevenness, the spectacular patchwork and more.

Then, yesterday as I was driving on Velachery Road, I noticed that some road 'pit-bumps' were patched up and the road on both sides looked kind of decent. Done overnight, probably. I was impressed and heartened.

Today, I realise that it was done overnight all because Kalaignar (Chief Minister of Tamilnadu) would be driving on Velachery Road today for ...whatever.

Angry is what I got...and that's when I imagined a scenario that may be prevailing today, my imagination helped quite a bit by films like Indian and Anniyan, which I really loved.

That made me think that those in charge of this nation -- be it in bits and pieces or the whole country, need to come CLEAN. Power means serve the nation or some people. Otherwise, do 'your people' a favour and ...'make like a tree and leave'! I wanted to actually say 'and...get lost', but then I always wanted to use the above words;)

Tuesday, 08.05.2007 -- Thinking and Talking

so, my blog seemed so full of my articles that i though I would write about something else. Like what i did today. A LOT of cooking and one paatu class which was severely interrupted by Tara. She was using my lap as a slide (!) during class when i sang Samba shiva (our favourite) and then tried to catch my hand as I attempted to put thaalam. Since she is not even three the whole thing was funny and unfortunately for my pleasant teacher, I got the major giggles inbetween!!

I also got a fantastic compliment from an old family friend who said that she loved my writing so much that had I been her daughter, she would have been sending everyone she knew my writing samples as she would have just burst with pride. naturally, i am aware that i am not SUCH a great writer but the fact that someone so staunchly vouches for my writing makes me puff up a bit!:)

Speaking of puff, any fat people out there who are trying to lose weight? Help! I have n't seen my gym for over 2 weeks (domestic reasons)and while I managed to lose 1 and a half of the 3 kgs i put on (holiday in Goa) WITHOUT working out, I really want go downhill on the weighing scale!!!

But now, I think I must start introspecting on whether I REALLY want to get rid of the excess weight enough to stop enjoying goodies....ahhh the familiar sinking feeling that I don't want the weight off as badly as i want the food in.

I guess 'Old habits die hard' if at all you manage to kill them in the end!