Wednesday, March 21, 2018

Throwback cos it's nearly Thursday - my favourite coasters

When I was young, we had a lot of interesting things at home. My Dad was a collector of unique showpieces and display/household items. He also had an extensive crystal collection. Since I wasn't allowed to touch the breakable stuff like his precious crystal / porcelain collection, I felt free to toy with what was in regular use. Like a couple of coasters.
They were round and light-hearted in design and caption. I remember two of them specifically. One had a :-) Smiley face. The caption was SMILE. IT MAKES PEOPLE WONDER WHAT YOU'RE UP TO.
I caught on to that right away and enjoyed doing it right through my teens (not on purpose perhaps). Whenever i smiled, people did ask why i was smiling, or became uncomfortable. That was fun.
The other coaster I recall, had this caption with a bull caricature: "I'm a bit of a bullshitter myself, but 'YOU' go ahead, I'm listening." For the longest time, I didn't understand what it meant. I didn't know what bullshit meant, didn't dare ask anyone, & it just didn't strike me to check the dictionary I guess. But the then-forbidden word 'shit' in it made it a fun coaster for me, which I enjoyed setting out on the table whenever we had company.

Saturday, March 17, 2018

SHE did it!


She met him. She fell in love with him; and he with her. She wanted to spend time with him. He did too. They were in a romantic relationship. After some time, he began pulling away. She began pursuing him. He resisted. She persisted. They tried to work it out. She tried different tactics to save the relationship. He began slipping away despite that. She was torn to bits. He wouldn’t give in to her advances. He had fallen out of love with her. She asked. He denied. She begged and pleaded. He wouldn’t agree to continue their relationship. She became passive-aggressive. And then she became needy. It didn’t feel right to him. She appealed to his sympathetic side. He rejected those appeals. She wanted him. He didn’t want her.
She didn’t want to live without him. He withdrew completely. He couldn’t handle her any more. He couldn’t tolerate her tears, persuasion, anger, threats. She followed him around, showing up at his place of work, his residence, his vehicle; his usual jaunts. He became allergic to the sight and mention of her. She became increasingly desperate but was unable to let him go. She was frustrated by his rejection. How could he have loved her so much at first and then turned away so coldly and so finally? She could not accept it. She contemplated being more forceful in her methods so that he could get her message loud and clear -- that she was not going to leave him and that he owed her their relationship.
But then, nothing worked.
He would now have to pay for what he had done to her. Her broken heart had a high price. She considered disfiguring him, but that would require much strategic scheming. So she made up her mind. She knew his whereabouts right through the day having painstakingly stalked him for many days. She kept her weapon ready in her bag and prowled along his route hoping to catch him and make him pay for the pain he had caused her.
She did it!
The media erupted at this incident. The men came all out on their twitter handles and facebook pages condemning not just her and this incident, but they attacked all women with vicious words. They broadcasted their hatred for feminism and bashed all feminists. They alleged that this was what feminism was about. So why should feminists have voices? Why should they get any platform to speak and be heard? Why should they even be tolerated in society? These men targeted each and every feminist they knew and let loose abusive comments. They flirted with restraining orders and police action in their efforts to validate their points against feminism.
They snarled that in the name of feminism, women were getting away with even murder! These men raged and ranted against womenkind. This woman should now be punished in the harshest way possible so that all women learn their lessons and cannot ever, get away with stalking their lovers.
When a man says no, he means no! A man’s personal space is sacrosanct. Every gathering, every tea stall, every news channel gave voice for anguished men to vent their grief. Every small and big injustice by women against men was discussed.

PS - Pained Script. 
Live in Peace, all you pained, disfigured, once-physically-beautiful ladies. The acid splashed on you by those vile men destroyed the life you were used to and you had to then reconcile to a new existence filled with coping mechanisms.
Rest in Peace, all you slayed women. The men who did you in could not take your NO for an answer. For, those villains did not even mean to ask you what you wanted. They just meant to grab and keep what they wanted and when they found they couldn’t do that, they showed their scant regard for the human in womanhood.

Sunday, September 03, 2017

My chemistry with Chemistry



I have no recollection of when Chemistry entered my life. It seemed to have gnawed at me until I simply had to pay attention, and by then, I was in Class 9 and the teachers seemed to be yelling at us to buck up for the 10th standard Board exams. I remember lurking outside the Chemistry lab, desperately trying to avoid the teacher’s eagle eye by looking busy either rummaging in my bag for assorted books & stationery, or bending down to tie my already-tied shoe laces. Most of 9th Standard was spent this way. By the time I reached Class 10, I was a pro at dodging the Chemistry teacher. I would always look harassed, busy, distracted and studious all in quick succession, or I would sidle up to any really good student (most of my friends were ‘good’ students – well academically, anyway) and so, the teacher would think I was earnest and many times, that was enough for her!
Oh, I was earnest alright. Earnest about not getting caught because I understood close to nothing about this subject! Looking back now, I really wonder how I passed the Class 10 feared board exams. The answer is this. God and the Universe (including faraway stars and galaxies) smiled down at me and said ‘thou shalt pass the Class 10 exams and leave Chemistry in peace forever.”
And so, when Chemistry exam morning dawned bright (as it always damn well does on an exam day), I was a nervous bundle of wreck. I was desperate to pass just so I didn’t have to meet with Chemistry ever again. I took my place in the lab quivering like a big jelly fish. I couldn’t meet any one’s eyes in case I broke down in anticipation of not getting my required result of the experiment. I began the experiment without my usual lack of focus and went through the steps as though I was a horse with blinders.
Being such an abysmally poor student of Chemistry, I can only recall this much – that my element for the exam was zinc oxide and I had to get it right by getting green-edged ash on a tissue paper. I only knew the theory of it having studiously steered clear of all experiments, beakers and test tubes until that final moment. For Harry Potter fans, let me share with you, that I was like Neville Longbottom in front of Professor Severus Snape in Potions, designed for disaster and humiliation.

Anyway, as I said, I was smiled upon by the Creator as well as his Creations like the Universe and what not, because I did get the green-edged ash on the edges of my tissue paper. I erupted in glee and (I kid you not here) galloped towards the formidable Chemistry teacher who was lazily lounging on a chair and chatting with the External Examiner looking supremely relaxed. She looked up startled at the galloping gooseberry in front of her as I panted and waved my green edged ash tissue in her face. “Miss, Miss, I got zinc oxide – the correct reaction – green edged ash!” I huffed and I puffed, and showed her most of my teeth as I did this and after a shocked pause, she snapped not unkindly, “Ok. But have you finished writing this out for the exam?” Deflating at once but unable to contain my relief, I quickly turned tail and shuffled back to my spot to write out the experiment knowing I had passed and Chemistry and I were getting an out-of-court hefty divorce settlement on mutual consent and collaboration. It’s what we call a win-win situation. 

Tuesday, March 21, 2017

World Sparrow Day

Summer afternoons with a tired mom, elderly grandpa and irritable older sister left me lonely…well almost. This is a kuruvi kadhai (sparrow story) on World Sparrow Day. It was the sparrow that kept me fully occupied those humid, boring afternoons. At first, Amma Sparrow built a nest above our big heater in the bathroom. Namma Ooru Summer meant that no heater was ever switched on. So we had bits and pieces of those brown sticks and twigs from the nest regularly falling on our heads. It didn’t help my curly shock of hair one bit. The other problem was that the sparrow eggs were tender and tiny and likely to fall from their perch on the heater. Then, after a couple of eggs were ruined having accidentally rolled out of the nest onto the bathroom floor, the ladies of the house moved the nest carefully to our long, wide verandah. Amma Sparrow didn’t seem to object. Soon we had a few baby fledglings. Those baby sparrows were simply delightful. And they kept me out of the way of the angry Akka, snoozing Thatha and busybee Amma. Two of them managed to gain independence really fast. The 3 rd was a bit slow but tried her best. She became my playmate. There was a drain hole in the floor of the verandah that seemed clogged towards the outlet. It was like a tunnel for the baby sparrow, and am sure she could see the light at the end of it. This baby sparrow couldn’t fly yet but clearly felt ready for some exploration. So, she would try to scuttle into the drain hole. I was terribly worried that she would get stuck there or worse, fall out of the drainhole from the first floor. So, I would put my two fingers in and gently grasp her teeny tail and tug her back out. She would then look a bit confused and again waddle into the hole trying to stuff her tiny body right in before I could catch her tail. But I would always make it in time to tug her back out, tail first, with her expression of resignation still fresh in my mind. I would then happily cradle her soft furry body in my palms before letting her loose to try her luck in the clogged drain hole again. This was our game. It was a never ending one. Rather like this post :-P 
True story. Love sparrows.

Saturday, November 16, 2013

GRR, parents of babies at the movies!

I love babies too. They're cute, innocent, cuddly and what not.

But please don't bring them to a movie theater because there are some souls like me who would like to take a break from routines and sit back and watch a movie in peace in a darkened environment without other unnecessary interruptions.

This couple in the row before me brought one baby each (don't know whether they were twins or what). The babies' crying got louder and louder, but the parents were adamant not to leave, or take the children out for a breather, or even take turns. Why should I and the others in the theater have to put up with this when we have paid for a chilled-out movie experience and driven 45 minutes one-way for it? The movie was a violent one with a lot of fights. The parents should have known better!

I did shush them a few times with a general 'shhh' but nothing worked. Hmph.

Tuesday, November 12, 2013

Rumbumbum Arumbum...AARAMBAM

"Keep it simple."
"Make it simple."
"...Simple."



Ajith's (Thala) punch dialogues started off this way. So, am going to keep it simple. Anyway it's a simple plot. And the movie sequences make simpletons out of us. Saying it's Mumbai and then showing us Chennai for it, hmph. That sort of stuff. The simple plot is that an anti-terrorist/bomb squad team loses its officers due to the slipshod quality of the bullet-proof jacket approved by a top cop and politician plus a media person, who all make a lot of money out of it. A surviving member of the bomb squad team -- i.e. our Thala Ajith brings them the gory glory they deserve. Death by various ways. Off a Dubai skyscraper, off few dozen gunshots, off some big bombs, etc.



My dog's name is Rover and the story's over.



Now for the actors (I love this part).


AJITH KUMAR as AK i.e. Ashok Kumar in this film -- is the seemingly anti-hero who is in fact just a hero. I dunno about his acting skills, which really, I cannot comment on for some non-specific reason. It ain't bad and it ain't heart-stopping. Because acting is not the point with this guy whose head full of grey hair has been the talk of the town. His mere personality and consequent style is THE point. The fact is... that he isn't a supremely wonderful dancer like Vijay or a six pack hard-working, beautiful-eyed guy like Suriya, for example. He's a guy you and I may like or even find hot if we met him somewhere. He's very believable as a not-that-young guy with his 50 shades of grey hair, healthy body complete with a comfortingly cushiony tummy area, good legs (not that I saw them heheh), wide shoulders, fit arms and an extremely awesome gait. Sophisticated-looking and understated acting. And unlike some odd salutes and ridiculous-mock-ridiculous expressions, AJIT KUMAR'S style is made of one-liners which are each time delivered deadpan with an expressionless voice and just the way he wears his sunglasses, which is rather er, knee-weakening. I went prepared to scoff, and came away blushing. Seriously stylish man this. And I don't think he's acting!! When he got on to that Ducati, the audience roared and my pulse raced. If you're female, you'll know what I mean about this self-assured actor. Am afraid he's hot.



NAYANTARA is Maya and her relationship with Ajit in the film is rather up-in-the-air (but he did feel her up a few times, so...you never know how many shades of grey were actually there in their relationship). She is smoking hot. Skin, hair, figure, posture, confidence, acting...everything about her clicks.



The babies Arya & Taapsee -- feel sad for Arya, to club him with airhead Taapsee. But they are a pair with one baby-oh baby routine, silly jokes and overall extra silliness. But I guess, that's her part and Arya's cool as the indignant Fat Boy Slim entangled with AJIT and his comic timing is as good as it always is.



Ajit's Aarambam (The Beginning). I guess it will fly because of this style icon AJIT KUMAR. If he acts in a film, it's his and nobody else's these days. I believe it now. He's the crutch this film AARAMBAM and its makers lean heavily on and for his part, AJIT KUMAR - Thala, takes it in his stride and sweeps on, as he dons his coolers in a highly believable, everyday style.



*Sigh*