Thursday, September 10, 2009

Pissing Off

It's a tough world for the females. If we want to relieve ourselves anywhere, can't just stand up and do the act. We need proximity to the ground or appropriate toilet bowl. Being female, I do know that.

At a busy traffic light spot in Adyar, near the Adyar bridge, our car stopped right behind a tourist SUV. Even as the light was going to turn green, I saw a couple of men alight from the car in the MIDDLE of the road next to the median and one of them had a toddler-girl in his arms. he proceeded to remove her panties and got her to squat in between the car and the median (2 feet space perhaps?) for the 'relief' (pee). The light turned green and amidst honking, we did manage to swerve around this vehicle and proceed, but I continue to feel appalled by this. I mean with a toddler and travelling, would you not be prepared with a diaper or two?Or at least a nappy pad? If you can afford to hire a tourist car surely you can afford a nappy pad? Not that I have anything against them, but this was clearly a North Indian family -- er, to clarify, not that I think a South Indian family would not do this...

Then this morning, outside a school, JUST outside the school gate on the platform mind you, and not even at the corner near the wall as many men are wont to peeing(UGH), this was right as you step up on to the platform... I saw a mother with a 3 year old setting her daughter with underwear down for a quick pee on the edge of the platform, before entering the school!

Um, hallo? Is it me? Am I fussing for nothing? Is this normal behaviour?

It's not as if I am talking unsympathetically. I have been there. And have always been prepared...with a child, you need to plan, anticipate, prepare and stay prepared. Not bring out the junglee in you for the poor kid to imitate.

'Pisses' me off, really.

Tuesday, September 08, 2009

Diet means food, food, food!

Diet. The D word. The ultimate four letter word. One of the worst. Stinks of 'less food' if you ask me. *sniffle*


Except, nowadays, the definition of food itself has changed and so also has 'more food' replaced 'less food'.


We hear about so many diets all over the place. The more popular ones involve eating small meals every two hours. EVERY TWO HOURS. That's a heck of a lot of eating, really. And more than the eating, it is the whole planning-the-food business that's daunting.

8 am breakfast
10 am a soup or a sandwich (I suppose)
12 noon 2 phulkas and dhal and veggies
2 pm a fruit
4 pm biscuits (hrrrumph)
6 pm sundal
8 pm dinner.


Oh dear God.

Think of the preparation! Sure, Miz. Size Zero Kareena Kapoor can do it cos she has to just turn around every two hours and find her plate full of diet goodies in front of her, whipped up by her 'Maharaj' or equivalent. (Er, not feeling 'J' or anything, but ...that's life...for her).

Me, if I have to just turn around, I will just see a flash of light in a red background that reads 'I AM HUNGRY and ANGRY'. At that point, nothing but fried potatoes, sambar rice with a generous dollop of ghee, will do. The dietician will require a calculator to sum up the calories consumed...hmph.
So this whole dieting business is much much more about food than in the case of a normal, easy going 'bulgy foodie' who just goes about his or her day with a coffee, breakfast (masala dosai! ya, ya, ya), a 'good' lunch, another coffee or tea, and then dinner. Simpler times. Eat what's available and when hungry. Don't fret over eggjact number of calories consumed, which soup, salad and sundal and get all weepy.

Actually, I am neither here nor there. I have to make huge efforts to remember to eat small meals and unlearn so many things about food -- going by the 'today's fad' that is, that every 2-3 days I get tired and slump back to life as I knew it.
Three square meals.

Bon Appetit!

Wednesday, September 02, 2009

Contagious stuff

Not just colds and swine flu, but...

1. Yawning

This is MOST contagious. Amazing how one yawns and immediately, the next person too does. I have asked some folks including doctors why this is so, but no real answers seem available. Even whilst talking on the phone, if I yawn, the person at the other end miles and miles away, also yawns!

2. Crying

Guess this is for the 'weepier' souls, but usually, if someone cries -- really heartfelt and reasonable tears, I automatically feel MY water tap opening up. Very embarrassing and really, not of any help or use. But, there it is.

3. Snapping

Snap at someone and see them snap back. Usually. Except for the highly calm folks (know very few myself and these are people who merely clam up as opposed to handling it maturely...which is WHAT I don't know!).

4. Smiles

Whether they are contagious or not, they ought to be returned and therefore termed contagious. Else...how rude!

5. Giggles

Giggles are not really contagious. In fact, I do know that they can really bug some people. You, know, the non-gigglers who in fact, can unknowingly cause more giggling. When I as a giggler come across an extremely straight face whilst in the middle of a big giggle session, things just get more giggle-worthy! Anyway, I can feel at least a smile coming on if I chance upon gigglers (unless of course, they are giggling at ME. Then, 'Hmph' to them).